anniversary!

friday is my parents 28th wedding anniversary. 
my 28th birthday is to follow two months later.  yep, you did that math right!

my parents marriage is one of the most inspiring marriages i have ever come across.  not because they are my parents, but because their marriage is very imperfect.  it is not without struggles.  in fact, it is riddled with them. 

having a baby two months out of the gate (hi guys!) can break any marriage quickly, i'm sure.  but aside from that challenge, my parents are probably two of the most different personalities you might ever come across.  which i believe is extremely challenging on a daily basis.  they are like black and white.  they are the definition of opposites attract.

my sister and i like to compare them to their dogs, honee bear and tink.  honee bear is a pomeranian that is the happiest dog you may ever meet.  she is always over the moon to see you.  she loves everyone deeply and truly and she shows them.  she is a little high strung.  she is the dog version of my mom.  tinkerbell is a very lazy chihuahua.  she is loving and sweet, but you have to get to know her.  she would be completely content to do nothing but sit on the couch in a blanket all day eating some snacks.  she is the dog version of my dad.  tinkerbell and honee are nothing alike, but for some reason they are inseparable.  they get very anxious without each other.  which is weird, because when they're together they almost never interact.  they're just used to being in close proximity.  they need that.

my parents' marriage is not just inspiring to me just because i find hilarious similarities in their relationship and their pets.  it's inspiring because i see that they have to work on it every day.  any person in a relationship can tell you that it takes work.  it really really does.  you don't just magically come to a happy place after a certain amount of time and then get to sit back and put your feet up.  you have to decide to be married and to love each other every day.  sometimes marriage can feel very lonely.  sometimes marriage can feel very stifling.  sometimes marriage can make you feel so lucky and happy and wonderful.  sometimes it can make you feel like crap.  my parents live these ups and downs.  they are visible to me.  they don't constantly bicker, but they also don't constantly kiss each other.  theirs is a real relationship. 

 

they are encouraging to me, because i can see that despite their extreme differences and their highs and lows, every day for the past 28 years they have chosen to be together.  that's what counts.  it is not always an easy choice, i'm sure.  but it has always been their choice, and for that i am grateful.  they are so good for each other and really balance each other out, even though they don't always see that.  they are brave for tolerating each other for so long.  and it's because deep down, i know that they love each other so very deeply.  i am glad that i am a little bit of both of them.  and i'm lucky that they're mandy and my parents.  happy anniversary, kids!